Not sure how things are going right now.
She seems to be avoiding fighting right now.
I took my son to see my mom (his grandmother) down in virginia (because my mom was vacationing there with my crazy annoying niece). Girlfriend was pissed at first because I didn't tell her about all the events over this weekend (bandpractice sat, driving to see my mom, gone sunday with my mom, back to work monday, band show on monday night). I told her. But not that they would all be on the same weekend and I didn't remind her the week of.
Anyway... Drove car in middle of the night. Slept until 11:00 the next day (AWESOME!) while my mom took niece and my son to ride horses. Then we went to the mall and bought crap, and noticed the large number of hispanics out in the middle of mall in bumfuck virginia - wierd.
Came back and went out to dinner. Dinner was a disaster - crying niece and whining son and cold food. I realized I was that guy in the restaurant that everyone looks at and says "man I am GLAD I am not THAT guy". Fuck.
Drove home and girlfriend was thankfully asleep. She didn't give me crap that I didn't call her saturday night to let her know that I was okay. She didn't give me too much crap that I took my son out to eat too late for him to want to eat.
Her not giving me crap is a good sign. We'll see how it goes as winter progresses. I really should buy her a sunlamp but part of me wants to see how bad things will get natrually because I don't think she will really use a lamp over the long run if at all - I don't think she think she has SAD.
Monday, October 27, 2008
Speculative Metaphysics #023420498
Metaphysical Theory #023420498:
Going with the Copenhagen Interpretation of quantum physics... The wave form collapse can only be initiated when a "conscious" observer "observes" the particle(s)/energy that is superposition. This is usually done in science by taking a measurement. Some physicists further extend the idea to the macro level (Schrodinger's Cat etc...) and say that just looking at or sensing an object in superposition collapses the wave form.
Anyway... What makes something "Conscious"? In Metaphysical Theory #023420498 it is the act of being sensed/detected/experienced by another conscious entity that makes something sentient.
This means that children actually REQUIRE the attention of adults, not for emotional or developmental reasons, but for PHYSICAL reasons. The more attention they get, the more fully realized a sentient being they become - the more integrated and aware of reality they are.
This gives an alternative explanation to neglected (eastern block orphanage) children. They are damaged not from the neglect but from the deficit of wave form collapse that are necessary to become fully conscious. In the inbetween state they seem abnormal and aberrant or retarded or out of touch with reality. In actuality, the reverse is true. It is reality that is out of touch with them as they are not connected enough to it to respond consciously.
Going with the Copenhagen Interpretation of quantum physics... The wave form collapse can only be initiated when a "conscious" observer "observes" the particle(s)/energy that is superposition. This is usually done in science by taking a measurement. Some physicists further extend the idea to the macro level (Schrodinger's Cat etc...) and say that just looking at or sensing an object in superposition collapses the wave form.
Anyway... What makes something "Conscious"? In Metaphysical Theory #023420498 it is the act of being sensed/detected/experienced by another conscious entity that makes something sentient.
This means that children actually REQUIRE the attention of adults, not for emotional or developmental reasons, but for PHYSICAL reasons. The more attention they get, the more fully realized a sentient being they become - the more integrated and aware of reality they are.
This gives an alternative explanation to neglected (eastern block orphanage) children. They are damaged not from the neglect but from the deficit of wave form collapse that are necessary to become fully conscious. In the inbetween state they seem abnormal and aberrant or retarded or out of touch with reality. In actuality, the reverse is true. It is reality that is out of touch with them as they are not connected enough to it to respond consciously.
PKD and Zebra
Read an interesting tidbit online in a page of a book I haven't actually read called "Pink Beams of Light from the God in the Gutter" (page 60). My friend WA sent me the link. He is a PKDickhead.
Metaphysical Theory #013412341:
God is gradually replacing material items with his "body". This means that some objects in the world are made of "debased" matter (a reference I suppose to the gnostic idea of the false creator that actually made our world) and some are actually "real" in that they are composed of the perfection of god and are actually literally god. But I suppose god has to mimic the form of the actual material item until the metamorphoses/transubstantiation is fully complete - I suppose so that we humans are not totally freaked out by the literal presence of God in our lives - something we aren't prepared to deal with so God is just being a nice guy. Thanks God!
Metaphysical Theory #013412341:
God is gradually replacing material items with his "body". This means that some objects in the world are made of "debased" matter (a reference I suppose to the gnostic idea of the false creator that actually made our world) and some are actually "real" in that they are composed of the perfection of god and are actually literally god. But I suppose god has to mimic the form of the actual material item until the metamorphoses/transubstantiation is fully complete - I suppose so that we humans are not totally freaked out by the literal presence of God in our lives - something we aren't prepared to deal with so God is just being a nice guy. Thanks God!
Friday, October 24, 2008
My Bowels
So uh... yeah. I seem to have Celiac's disease. But I haven't had it diagnosed. Partially because I have already cut out grains (and seen a huge improvement in health) and everything I have read says that Celiac's is extremely hard to diagnose once wheat has been removed from the diet. But partially because I am too busy to make and go to a doctors appointment. The prospect of waiting 3 months to see a specialist doesn't help.
So no wheat for me. I cut out dairy a loooong time ago. But other foods give me troubles. I haven't noticed a pattern until today!
So I read about chickpeas... which lead me to this:
Grain legumes are cultivated for their seeds, and are also called pulses. The seeds are used for human and animal consumption or for the production of oils for industrial uses. Grain legumes include both herbaceous plants like beans, lentils, lupins, peas and peanuts.[4] and trees such as carob, mesquite and tamarind.
All of the above legumes seem to fuck up my digestion. I didn't know they were all in the same family. Weird. I wonder what the issue is. Maybe they all have the same molecule that messes up my intestines or sends my immune system into insane overreaction.
So no wheat for me. I cut out dairy a loooong time ago. But other foods give me troubles. I haven't noticed a pattern until today!
So I read about chickpeas... which lead me to this:
Grain legumes are cultivated for their seeds, and are also called pulses. The seeds are used for human and animal consumption or for the production of oils for industrial uses. Grain legumes include both herbaceous plants like beans, lentils, lupins, peas and peanuts.[4] and trees such as carob, mesquite and tamarind.
All of the above legumes seem to fuck up my digestion. I didn't know they were all in the same family. Weird. I wonder what the issue is. Maybe they all have the same molecule that messes up my intestines or sends my immune system into insane overreaction.
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